Rejections

Rejections. The bane of our existence.

They are tough. They are harsh. They make you want to wrap yourself in a sheet, stare at the computer all day, and angrily yell "Bored!" at everything you read.

But the sad truth is that rejections are a necessary part of being a writer. Without them, we would be nothing, for three reasons.

• They force you to improve your craft. 
• They force you to become a humbler, more decent human being. 
• Most importantly, they force you to really examine how you feel about writing. 

Craft

There is no such thing as a good first draft. But that's what drafts are for. You get all the bones out there, and then you add the layers that make it real.

First novels are much the same. Very few people write a spectacular first novel. (And when I say that, don't go getting the idea that yours will be different. Because there's a 96.34% chance that it won't.) 

By the time most authors get to the publication of their debut novel, they've already written three or four that previously got scrapped. At least.

Still, no one ever believes that until it happens to them. I sure didn't. I had a lot of erroneous ideas about that first novel. And let me tell you now, I'm kind of embarrassed that I let it see the light of day. 

But it's a necessary part of the process. Because if I had never sent it out, I never would have gotten rejected, I never would have realized that it was terrible, and I never would have gone on a ravenous rampage through the internet world in order to discover what I could have possibly done wrong. 

And I never would have written newer stuff. Stuff that is exponentially better. 

Common Decency

Writing (or rather finishing) a novel can make us feel like we're on the top of the world. Rejection letters remind us that we're still human. 

It's not bad to feel that rush of excitement. To glory in the sense of having accomplished something worthwhile. But sometimes people forget that being a nice person is a good thing. Being a royal douchebag just makes everyone's life harder. 

You'll get a lot farther in the world, and in the publishing industry, by being a decent human being. By treating people with respect, even when you disagree. By listening to advice, and having an open mind about your work. 

Rejection letters can give us that occasional reminder that the world does not revolve around us. When we remember that, everything about our writing is better off for it. 

The Crossroads 

Your first rejection letter is the most important. It's what separates the dabblers from the artists.

In anything we do, there comes a point where we have to decide what we really want. 

Law school is hard. Do we really want to spend all that time, all that money, and all that misery so that we can have a career in law? 

Mount Everest is insane. Do we really want to go through those many training hours, base camp acclimation, and the risk certain death just to stand on the literal top of the world for five seconds?

Up until that first rejection, anyone with a pen and a few bits of notepaper can claim to be a writer. Not so many make it back out again. 

That rejection letter is your critical moment. The point where you realize that a career in writing is not going to be a piece of cake. 

Are you willing to endure the pain of drastic edits, the hours of  sometimes fruitless work, the sleepless nights? Are you willing to be critiqued, sometimes harshly? Are you willing to risk repeated rejections in order to get your work out there?

Do you have what it takes to persevere when the going gets tough? 

You won't know until you try. 

Don't be afraid of that first rejection letter.

No matter what it says, or how you react to it, that letter will help you decide where you want to go with your life. This is a good thing. 

But if you're worried because you love writing so much, don't be. It's the dark times that show us what we're really made of, and most of us are surprised to find that, when the light comes back again, we're made of much tougher stuff than we thought we were. If you love writing that much, the rejection will only make you stronger. I guarantee it.